You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I forget how to act sober
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