I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
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