So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
