In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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