Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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