Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
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