i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Randomize