did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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