wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
