we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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