im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
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