You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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