Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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