quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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