Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize