i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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