how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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