There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize
