I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
