I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
