There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
this will be a night to untag.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
