I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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