Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
