Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
