office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
