C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
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