Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
