Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize