8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
