Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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