He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
