Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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