As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize