No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
