We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Randomize
