hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Randomize
