Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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