just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize