if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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