Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
