My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Randomize
