Pappa wants mamma naked
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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