One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
