My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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