He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
