so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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