You work out of a Hotel?
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
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