What a fucking waste of an outfit
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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