just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize