i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
